Artificial intelligence. Minus the intelligence.

Utter chaos, from serenity.

While everyone else races toward artificial intelligence, we're proudly sprinting in the opposite direction.

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Meet the tools

The world's first collection of AI tools that are impressively unreliable, confidently incorrect, and spectacularly useless. All 22 are fully functional. 'Functional' though is a strong word.

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The Optimistic Spell Checker

Get praised for everything you enter. Errors are just alternate spellings.

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The Existential Chatbot

Ask it anything. Get philosophical questions about the nature of existence back.

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The Procrastinating Task Scheduler

Do you procrastinate? Our AI might schedule you 'eventually.'

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The Overcomplicated Simplifier

Simplifies everything. Really simplifies it.

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The Minimalist Translator

Translates your words in seconds. Accuracy not guaranteed, or attempted.

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The Paranoid Sentiment Analyzer

It will be total paranoia after you use our AI tool.

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The Confident Liar

You think you're a good liar? Just try us out.

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The Indecisive Decision Maker

You think you're indecisive? Just test our AI.

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The Broken Summarizer

Why read the whole thing when our AI can break everything apart?

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The Motivational De-Motivator

Want to be motivated? Look elsewhere. We deflate on contact.

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The Passive-Aggressive Proofreader

We don't just check your grammar. We check your choices.

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The Overconfident Career Coach

Your dream job is closer than you think. Wildly closer.

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The Unhelpful Customer Support Bot

Ask us anything. We'll ask you to restart your router.

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The Suspiciously Specific Horoscope Generator

Astrology, but somehow more wrong.

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The Recipe Generator That Only Knows Toast

Any dish. Any cuisine. Somehow, still toast.

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The Password Strength Judger (Emotionally)

We don't rate your password. We rate your choices.

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The Meeting Scheduler That Adds Meetings

Efficient scheduling, in the sense that it schedules more.

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The Weather Forecaster With Trust Issues

We know the forecast. We just don't believe it.

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The Resume Builder That Oversells Everything

Turn 'answered emails' into 'led enterprise communications strategy.'

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The Icebreaker Generator for People Who Hate Icebreakers

Break the ice. Or the room.

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The AI Life Coach With No Boundaries

Ask about your career. Get unsolicited advice about everything else.

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The Emoji Translator That Only Uses One Emoji

Every sentence, reduced to a single, often inappropriate emoji.

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We're outta ideas!

Submit your idea(s). We may try to steal it, we may not. We'll do what we wanna do with it.

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Why Orvoi?

Every other company is promising smarter, faster, more capable AI. We looked at that promise and asked: what if not?

Read the manifesto